Saturday, October 31, 2020

The Apple of His Eye ~ Saturday, October 31, 2020

Terence, my brother, never faced
      any competition,
how could I compare as a son
      to both of our parents,
even if I became the Pope,
      my brother was their son.

As the first-born son to parents
      from Nairobi, Kenya
people saw my older brother
      as my father's best friend,
perhaps I didn't have a clue,
      couldn't see past the tears,
left as a scapegoat to punish,
      I faced my role as bleak,
even if I played the misfit,
      as a child I was lost,

only by facing past trauma
      could I accept the pain
forgotten, suppressed and repressed
      in the mind of a boy.

Hope was not a feeling I felt,
      neither was happiness,
if I felt anything, I felt
      confused, lost and unloved,
second-born is always silver,
      never gold, a winner.

Even if I was a winner
      in a cross-country race,
yes, it happened my sophomore year,
      but no one ever knew,
even then, I could not compare,
      he was their superstar.

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