I've not tried gay love, yet. What I've heard: rainbow 🌈 flags and unicorns 🦄 appear.
Virtual media created the icons. Emojis are to blame.
Energy redirect: when the world 🌎 fails your soul, champion your own life.
Not that I would know love. Married once and divorced. Once bitten, twice shy 🤭, fear
Obfuscates all values. Trauma in a dark room...my brother and cousin
Tortured me with their touch, they tickled me to death, my soul died 💔 out of shame.
To them it meant nothing, just fun 😜 and games 🎮 for boys 👦. How 🤔 could I take a wife?
Resort to violence: my answer to trauma, as a child, I was blind.
If I could remember everything that happened out of Catholic sin...
Ever to blame the Church ⛪, teachers of trauma games♟, priests and nuns and deacons.
Despite their disavowal, the Church ⛪ is not to blame for my situation.
Gay love 💗 💗 appeared with AIDS in my adolescence, sinister as demons 😈.
As the news reported, it was the plague for some, even a crustacean.
Yes, I was a Cancer ♋, the worst sign in the sky. Crawling sideways, I find
Love 😻 finds me. The queer smell, mother is warm, then cold, oilsheet on a wet bed.
Outsider to the truth: I speak of what I know, what I don't know 🤷 is joy.
Violent objections, demonstrations of faith 🙏, I know not what you know.
Even so, as a crab 🦀, a pair of ragged claws can never get ahead.
Yet, to hear silent seas calling 📞 me like sirens 🚨 to scuttle across floors.
Even that made no sense when faced with life's choices. I sought love 💘 as a boy.
Terrible as it seems... I was a latch-key kid, there was no room to grow.
What was it like to grow in Huntington Beach? It was like Paradise.
Huge imported palm trees 🌴, pumpjacks dot the landscape for oil 🛢like dinosaurs 🦕,
Ancient creatures feeding modern automobiles 🚘, the Age of Fossil Fuel.
To get around South Coast, we had to learn to drive, cars were necessary.
I've lived in Chicago for nearly twenty years. Transit systems are cruel,
Vulnerable places to co-exist as harsh environments vary.
Energy redirect: From tropical climate to a bull market price.
How the weather changes every twenty minutes, anything happens here.
Every night 🌙 on the news, we learn of car jackings, smash and grab burglaries,
Armed robberies of banks, drive by shootings, murders turn into cold 🥶 cases.
Rough town where two million people live in terror as victims of their fear.
Disparities over decades go unresolved, the market creates crime.
Restless youth with nothing to look forward to, no vacations with snow skis.
Ask around people know but no one says a word, I see phantom faces...
I watch the evening news, images on TV. My friends don't watch the news.
No one to bear witness, no one to testify, no one to take the time.
Burnt-out on the city during this pandemic, why even be social?
On my phone, I give up Facebook and Instagram, Twitter as well, unreal.
Waste of time ⏲️, isolate, hide away from others, these days become racial.
Find myself reading 📚 books again with poor eye 👁sight, reading glasses to steal
Lingering coals of heat 🔥 burning in the fire 🔥 pit. I cannot sing the blues.
As I look back, my life gradually slips away, out of my grasp 👊, the past
Generates energy ✨: into the universe these molecules return,
Silent as cosmic dust. I am nothing but breath, hot air to some. I speak
As poets in the past evolved within language, the mother 👩 tongue 👅 to cast
Nothing but the idea of demons 😈 into hell, the world 🌎 of make-believe.
Demons 😈 and the Devil 🤘, sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll... I gave it all up, spurn
Unenchanted ideas in our disenchanted reality for weak,
Non-binding energy. I am not gravity and not frivolity.
I became serious when my sense of humor is harmful. I conceive
Correctly that my tone is ill-received by ears and eyes, right in the gut.
Ordinary people laugh in self-deception, the harm changes others.
Rightly, I laugh as well but my self-deception laughs at me in a rut.
Nothing but reflections, images and shadows, echoes from my brothers.
Still, I have seen the light flitting across the room, unharmed by gravity.
Appearances in space and time, phenomena before thoughts in the mind.
Precious little time left to wake ⏰ up before death but this mind is the same.
Pretend to get upset and yet I know better. I know this mind is clear.
Everyday I wake ⏰up to find myself alive and well. It is a game...
A game 🎮 of acceptance, take the good with the bad, there is nothing to fear.
Reading 📚 books like Borges, like James Joyce, like Milton, they all slowly 🐌 went blind.
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