As I sit up reading emails in bed, I look down on the floor to find Tati, my cat, quietly asleep on her bed, curled up in a ball beside the window. She does not have long for this world to enjoy, a growth at the base of her tail destroys the bone tissue as seen in three x-rays at the Hyde Park Animal Hospital. She's a fourteen year old tortoiseshell cat and one of three my girlfriend and I share our apartment with in a cluttered mess. Books are an addiction for me, I read but never enough to get through them all. I need to get rid of my collection to the point it becomes manageable because, for sure, I can't take them with me but it's so hard to let go of good books. As soon as I start to move, to get up out of our bed, Tati gets up and hides beneath our bed where I can't get to her. She needs her medicine but doesn't like the experience of a syringe full of medicine that probably tastes bad flooding her mouth with foul liquid. Poor cat but she is my responsibility. The hard part is knowing she'll be put down soon, in the near future, with no clear date. She is my sweetie kitty, I love her. There are not enough stars to weigh my love for this cat, even a black hole is much too light to bear the scales of gravity. To say goodbye is to much for my heart but I am not a sentimental man and will do what is best when the time comes. I am just glad that I am not alone in dealing with the challenges of life. Death is inevitable for us all. This much I know but it is not yet set. And so the uncertainty could kill me. Whatever comes, I am open to love. Bring it! I will tackle it with great care for this world needs a gentle hand to stroke her back and rub her belly when she wants.
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