There sits a beautiful woman, it's in her eyes, a deer caught in headlights
Hauntingly vacuous, statuesque odalisque, aesthetically deranged
Even if something were wrong with this picture, what then could I do to help
Relax Old Mādaras, this is but a wedding reception to enjoy
Enter these reflections with a pinch of sea salt, nothing gained, nothing lost
Socially, I am lost among the relatives of my lovely girlfriend
In this capacity, I feel a handicap, an inability
To float past everyone without a care, burdened by nothing, not even
Stars hammering my head inside out, outside in, what's the point of it all
Ask myself this question as an aged, old man with one foot in the grave
Beauty means nothing now, my infatuation with charming women died
Each year, I ask myself why am I still alive yet, I have no answer
Ask myself the meaning of Le Degré zéro du sens, I am speechless
Under these conditions, I feel trapped, a cheetah unable to stretch out
To take long strides and run after prey to capture deep in the savanna
In the delta region of the Kalahiri, as I imagine it
Fruitless, this life, penned in, so far from Africa, from the Okavango
Under these conditions, I start to go crazy with nothing but my mind
Life should not be like this but I must pay penance for crimes I do not know
Work until death for what, retire in a rest home, bring me my tantō, please
Only honor respects the bloodshed of battle but now, I am but bored
May I go read my book somewhere hidden away from the circus dancers
Ask myself this question, why does the Sphinx bother with this game of riddles
Nothing decimates man more than a conundrum, a date wrapped in bacon
Insist on nothing less, sweet with the savory, this my mid-life crisis
Taste the beauty of love, go down to the bottom and then, come up for air
Success tastes of perfume, fast cars, corner office, penthouse views at sunset
If I knew I would be a failure in this life, I would have sacrificed
Notions of liberty, free to choose as I please, to study what I want
Humanities, a joke, full of bad decisions, tumble down the spiral
Even if I could start over at say age twelve, I was still too fucked up
Remember my background with an alcoholic and a vacuum of sense
Enter a sensitive, artistic-minded child as the harpies swoop down
Yesterday, I woke up after just two hours sleep and the same thing, today
Enter the expressway the wrong way as we crash head-on on the off ramp
Single me out, punish me for doing something that I should not have done
Ask myself what went wrong, what events in my life stand out as past mistakes
Disestablish my mind the sovereignty of thought as primary to sense
Even if I could clear all my previous faults, what would I learn of love
Ever to remedy my broken character with self-love of the soul
Remember the body internalizes thoughts, feelings and emotions
Caught in the web of dreams, within muscle tissue, the trauma embeds eggs
Aspects of the novel, the new character flaws supersede the old ones
Unfortunately, time impedes the blockages emptiness must relieve
Given my past mistakes with my mother, keeper of all morality
Honor bright, I was good until I met brother dear as a young sadist
Terence is not Horace but as a pseudonym, Horace destroyed my world
Insight comes like lightning, a bolt out of the blue, clear skies, no clouds in sight
Never will I trust God to lead me to heaven or hell, this paradise
Headless as a horseman, undead and surviving this ethereal world
Even if I could wake the awoken spirit like the Buddha, himself
Ask myself, why would I save all humanity from their own treachery
Deem morality bunk, a construct, a system for criminal justice
Liquid fluidity, I let go of the past, of family, of trauma
Isometric balance, the equation in sync, chemistry as music
Grant me serenity for the alcoholic and his absent family
Honor bright, overcome the eternal return of the same as trauma
Trick the mind to become better than lost spirits, souls without an object
Still the beauty of truth, a woman, is fleeting, ephemeral as mist
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