The cousin of my girlfriend passed away
having a hard time with my emotions
experiences do not process grief
call my friends, so far away, just to say
out of the blue, by the way, I love you
ugly tears cannot fall in the oceans
learn nothing, move on, no sense of relief
deal with my feelings by writing these words
out of nowhere, wait for the other shoe
for everyone poops and everyone dies
maybe uncertainty and the unknown
yell at me, just to say, everyone cries
given the fear of death, may I postpone
insipid interest in the fallen birds
resting broken beneath giant windows
lifeless and dull, lives lost in a moment
for all the little birds in migration
restlessly traveling, pain comes and goes
in waves, at first acute, then a dull throb
endlessly, as a metaphor, unbent
needles dig through to bone, the sensation
diminished fifths, augmented fourths, tritones
passion decreases, this life makes me sob
as people come and go, whence to and fro
such questions remain unanswered, I ask
simply to wait for time to pass, to blow
eternally, as this dream wears a mask
detached from emotions, as from my bones
aging gracefully, a façade of cool
wake up before the death of my girlfriend
arrive at work late, I cannot pretend
yesterday, at church, I prayed, still a fool
Wednesday, November 20, 2024
Saturday, November 16, 2024
Bullseye ~ Saturday, November 16, 2024
All my fault, allegedly, from the start
leave it alone, let go and move forward
linger not in the past, memories last
morally bankrupt, friendship is an art
yet, because I could not save you from death
face the future alone, I turn shoreward
alone without family or friends, the past
undermines the present, a gift, this rift
lines the length of the fault, with your last breath
time stops, I must move on, I gotta go
allegedly, it is all my fault, dear
leave no stone unturned, they say, do they know
little understood matters as your fear
envelopes the universe as I sift
gently through memories as time stood still
emigrate to foreign lands, wish I could
decidedly, it is not the passport
liberty carries no baggage, ill-will
yellow as an egg yolk, scrambles my brain
forget the incident, live as I should
remember all the cocaine we would snort
otherwise focus on work and money
make a living, stay healthy, catch the train
try to put the past into perspective
haunted by a phantom, a ghost, your loss
exerted pressure, I'm no detective
slide down the slippery slope, lose the toss
try to see the context shift as honey
articulates a will, hate and money
reincarnation is a dream, as a dart
that flies toward the board, milk and honey
leave it alone, let go and move forward
linger not in the past, memories last
morally bankrupt, friendship is an art
yet, because I could not save you from death
face the future alone, I turn shoreward
alone without family or friends, the past
undermines the present, a gift, this rift
lines the length of the fault, with your last breath
time stops, I must move on, I gotta go
allegedly, it is all my fault, dear
leave no stone unturned, they say, do they know
little understood matters as your fear
envelopes the universe as I sift
gently through memories as time stood still
emigrate to foreign lands, wish I could
decidedly, it is not the passport
liberty carries no baggage, ill-will
yellow as an egg yolk, scrambles my brain
forget the incident, live as I should
remember all the cocaine we would snort
otherwise focus on work and money
make a living, stay healthy, catch the train
try to put the past into perspective
haunted by a phantom, a ghost, your loss
exerted pressure, I'm no detective
slide down the slippery slope, lose the toss
try to see the context shift as honey
articulates a will, hate and money
reincarnation is a dream, as a dart
that flies toward the board, milk and honey
Friday, November 15, 2024
Blackstone Diamond Cutter ~ Friday, November 15
What was I thinking when I said, "I do"?
heaven knows I should have become someone
addicted to heroin in a band
this did not happen, as the other shoe
waiting for it to drop, took a lifetime
ask me what I did in the meantime, son
sucker, I watched and counted grains of sand
I resurrected the dead-end jobs shift
to think I wasted my best years, my prime
how did I not see there was so much more
if I took a look around I would see
not only the forest but the seashore
kindness was nowhere to be found, a tree
in the forest fell, no one saw me drift
not simply downstream but to the ocean
grind the children in a spice mill, they say
work them to death, freedom is just a word
how I remember too much emotion
everyone else saw me as just intense
not that anyone else stood in my way
I could have been anyone when this bird
simply whispered in my ear, "I love you"
ask yourself what would you do, on the fence
in another state of mind, run like hell
did I blink, it melted with my mistakes
I do not want to hear it toll, the bell
despite lessons learned in life, that's the breaks
order a round of shots, the other shoe
heaven knows I should have become someone
addicted to heroin in a band
this did not happen, as the other shoe
waiting for it to drop, took a lifetime
ask me what I did in the meantime, son
sucker, I watched and counted grains of sand
I resurrected the dead-end jobs shift
to think I wasted my best years, my prime
how did I not see there was so much more
if I took a look around I would see
not only the forest but the seashore
kindness was nowhere to be found, a tree
in the forest fell, no one saw me drift
not simply downstream but to the ocean
grind the children in a spice mill, they say
work them to death, freedom is just a word
how I remember too much emotion
everyone else saw me as just intense
not that anyone else stood in my way
I could have been anyone when this bird
simply whispered in my ear, "I love you"
ask yourself what would you do, on the fence
in another state of mind, run like hell
did I blink, it melted with my mistakes
I do not want to hear it toll, the bell
despite lessons learned in life, that's the breaks
order a round of shots, the other shoe
Wednesday, November 13, 2024
Turn the Other Cheek ~ Wednesday, November 13, 2024
In a world of people with no regrets
no sense of repentance, or contrition
actions without consequences, no ends
without the means, as to ask, are all bets
off, is the world so unpredictable
revolve in orbits full of ambition
leave no stone unturned, watch how a rule bends
decisions make the law just or unjust
offenses where thought is indictable
forgive the harm before the damage done
pardon and absolve the ignorant sheep
emerge from silence as if to atone
once compensation pays for deepfake sleep
pass over to ignore the lack of trust
lack of upper crust, cucumber sandwich
elegant yet eccentric tea party
windows to empty chambers, shutters closed
if to hide the truth in an on/off switch
torture the children once behind closed doors
hover in wait to attack as sortie
needless extras around the set are poised
objectively as mannequin fodder
remain for the rest of time on all fours
erect a monument, an obelisk
grant a license for a poet to die
remember a duel is not without risk
engage in a sequence with the same lie
trade fame for immortality, dodder
slowly then fall, no regrets for egrets
no sense of repentance, or contrition
actions without consequences, no ends
without the means, as to ask, are all bets
off, is the world so unpredictable
revolve in orbits full of ambition
leave no stone unturned, watch how a rule bends
decisions make the law just or unjust
offenses where thought is indictable
forgive the harm before the damage done
pardon and absolve the ignorant sheep
emerge from silence as if to atone
once compensation pays for deepfake sleep
pass over to ignore the lack of trust
lack of upper crust, cucumber sandwich
elegant yet eccentric tea party
windows to empty chambers, shutters closed
if to hide the truth in an on/off switch
torture the children once behind closed doors
hover in wait to attack as sortie
needless extras around the set are poised
objectively as mannequin fodder
remain for the rest of time on all fours
erect a monument, an obelisk
grant a license for a poet to die
remember a duel is not without risk
engage in a sequence with the same lie
trade fame for immortality, dodder
slowly then fall, no regrets for egrets
Monday, November 11, 2024
Honoré ~ Monday, November 11, 2024
Got you by the proverbial Balzac
one or two, just checking, maybe you cough
turn your head, and don't get all hard and stiff
yellow-belly pacifist, don't fall back
or drop off basic training in retreat
underneath the tank treads, I hear you scoff
belligerent protester, off a cliff
you jump to save a pride from certain death
trouble is...you're still asleep on your feet
how you snore, felling trees with a hand saw
entertain me with your rhythm section
pretend you're awake, see the lion's paw
reach in and dig out your guts, defection
only promises the brig, your last breath
vicious kittens eat your entrails, you sail
endlessly on-board the Arctic Sunrise
rotation on the horizon, you frame
brilliance within a zen koan, your tail
instinctively twitches with REM
as sleep makes you realize all the lies
littered in the ocean, red zones of shame
But what debris do you see still asleep
ask me if I have read Stanisław Lem
leave me out of your business, Solaris
zippo to learn, light up another blunt
another eyes closed shut while we French kiss
cuddle afterbirth after sex, dull grunt
old carnivore, standing by, the good sheep
nervously awaiting their turn, the blade
edges each neck, cutthroat, Damascus grade
one or two, just checking, maybe you cough
turn your head, and don't get all hard and stiff
yellow-belly pacifist, don't fall back
or drop off basic training in retreat
underneath the tank treads, I hear you scoff
belligerent protester, off a cliff
you jump to save a pride from certain death
trouble is...you're still asleep on your feet
how you snore, felling trees with a hand saw
entertain me with your rhythm section
pretend you're awake, see the lion's paw
reach in and dig out your guts, defection
only promises the brig, your last breath
vicious kittens eat your entrails, you sail
endlessly on-board the Arctic Sunrise
rotation on the horizon, you frame
brilliance within a zen koan, your tail
instinctively twitches with REM
as sleep makes you realize all the lies
littered in the ocean, red zones of shame
But what debris do you see still asleep
ask me if I have read Stanisław Lem
leave me out of your business, Solaris
zippo to learn, light up another blunt
another eyes closed shut while we French kiss
cuddle afterbirth after sex, dull grunt
old carnivore, standing by, the good sheep
nervously awaiting their turn, the blade
edges each neck, cutthroat, Damascus grade
Śūnyatā ~ Monday, November 11, 2024
Rui Carlos da Cunha as a name
undermines sense, what we know of as time
in an instant, work done for eggs to break
Collect your things, too crazy for our game
as a consequence, you now have no home
resort to meetings, as it is your dime
lost down the slot to make a call, a freak
of nature to madness, we cast you out
such love is family, I burn this dome
dimensions of climate heat up the air
as a sādhu, my revenge is your joy
Consequences of torture are unfair
underneath the veneer, as your boy toy
needless harm to a child was done, I pout
harness the sun, my chariot bakes shame
as forgiveness to understanding lost
answer this question, for what was my crime
such an inconsiderate brat to blame
anger bottled up as pure rage, a child
no one will ever know, thrown away, tossed
across the room like cloths covered in grime
murdered my soul, a three-year old, brother
ecclesiastical hate crime, the wild
ugly, underbelly of alcohol
noteworthy for nothing, fame rule, I choose
decisive action, at your beck and call
endless maneuvers to take not to lose
recollection, a monster, the other
murder my soul, brother, for millions earned
insatiable ignorance feeds on wealth
necessary to institute power
egotistical maniac, you learned
skills to broker abuse as a lifestyle
senselessly demonic, as mental health
eats the bonds of family, ivory tower
necessary refuge to find logic
skilled in argument to refute denial
enable the alcoholic to harm
welcome to neglect behind closed doors, see
how the bruises never show, the alarm
admonishes ill-will as purpose, free
the soul family murders, top hat magic
wand in hand, tap, tap, tap, pull the rabbit
egomaniacal brother, you win
kiss me goodbye, I lose, as I become
nothingness incarnate, out of habit
old eggshells, childhood fears, I stomp to crush
worthless as an adult, venial sin
obliges me to speak, the zero-sum
forgiveness in your embrace, my karma
ask me not to pity the helpless thrush
suffers the little bird with broken neck
transparent windows kill us all, we fall
in an instant, game over, what the heck
murder my soul, impermanence, recall
emptiness, I die, this is my dharma
undermines sense, what we know of as time
in an instant, work done for eggs to break
Collect your things, too crazy for our game
as a consequence, you now have no home
resort to meetings, as it is your dime
lost down the slot to make a call, a freak
of nature to madness, we cast you out
such love is family, I burn this dome
dimensions of climate heat up the air
as a sādhu, my revenge is your joy
Consequences of torture are unfair
underneath the veneer, as your boy toy
needless harm to a child was done, I pout
harness the sun, my chariot bakes shame
as forgiveness to understanding lost
answer this question, for what was my crime
such an inconsiderate brat to blame
anger bottled up as pure rage, a child
no one will ever know, thrown away, tossed
across the room like cloths covered in grime
murdered my soul, a three-year old, brother
ecclesiastical hate crime, the wild
ugly, underbelly of alcohol
noteworthy for nothing, fame rule, I choose
decisive action, at your beck and call
endless maneuvers to take not to lose
recollection, a monster, the other
murder my soul, brother, for millions earned
insatiable ignorance feeds on wealth
necessary to institute power
egotistical maniac, you learned
skills to broker abuse as a lifestyle
senselessly demonic, as mental health
eats the bonds of family, ivory tower
necessary refuge to find logic
skilled in argument to refute denial
enable the alcoholic to harm
welcome to neglect behind closed doors, see
how the bruises never show, the alarm
admonishes ill-will as purpose, free
the soul family murders, top hat magic
wand in hand, tap, tap, tap, pull the rabbit
egomaniacal brother, you win
kiss me goodbye, I lose, as I become
nothingness incarnate, out of habit
old eggshells, childhood fears, I stomp to crush
worthless as an adult, venial sin
obliges me to speak, the zero-sum
forgiveness in your embrace, my karma
ask me not to pity the helpless thrush
suffers the little bird with broken neck
transparent windows kill us all, we fall
in an instant, game over, what the heck
murder my soul, impermanence, recall
emptiness, I die, this is my dharma
Sunday, November 10, 2024
Futebol ~ Sunday, November 10, 2024
Papa Kitty waits for God in his bar
as if to him the burning bush would speak
perhaps he feels as if he were special
as if a hundred dollars would go far
Killing time with fútbol on the TV
if penalty kicks matter to the weak
transparent losers as they arm wrestle
their way to the championship, P. K.
yells himself hoarse with polyps doctors see
while his pipe dream came true, he never left
attendance of the bar to anyone
if God could intervene, perhaps a theft
tragic as that sounds, he wants to have fun
see the world with travel to Han Cathay
forgive to forget, he wants to move on
ordeals and struggles makes him desire more
rolling on the floor laughing like a dog
God couldn't be bothered to care less, son
on the move with a whirlwind tour, to sell
dishes in Han Cathay, as if to score
instinctively, a deal for some peat bog
needles under his fingernails, torture
how Papa Kitty accepts how he fell
if grace matters to religious players
sellouts for commercial advertisements
bailed out of jail by his thoughtful lawyers
as if he were a kid, their chastisements
result in zero punishments, for sure
as if to him the burning bush would speak
perhaps he feels as if he were special
as if a hundred dollars would go far
Killing time with fútbol on the TV
if penalty kicks matter to the weak
transparent losers as they arm wrestle
their way to the championship, P. K.
yells himself hoarse with polyps doctors see
while his pipe dream came true, he never left
attendance of the bar to anyone
if God could intervene, perhaps a theft
tragic as that sounds, he wants to have fun
see the world with travel to Han Cathay
forgive to forget, he wants to move on
ordeals and struggles makes him desire more
rolling on the floor laughing like a dog
God couldn't be bothered to care less, son
on the move with a whirlwind tour, to sell
dishes in Han Cathay, as if to score
instinctively, a deal for some peat bog
needles under his fingernails, torture
how Papa Kitty accepts how he fell
if grace matters to religious players
sellouts for commercial advertisements
bailed out of jail by his thoughtful lawyers
as if he were a kid, their chastisements
result in zero punishments, for sure
Saturday, November 2, 2024
As a Lark for Larkin ~ Saturday, November 2, 2024
I was killing time inside a bookstore
waiting for the Nepalese restaurant
across the street to open up again
starving, the hyperbole of a bore
killing himself slowly for many years
if long distance running is but a jaunt
literally, down the road without the yen
lifting me up, a butterfly in flight
injury added to insult, the tears
needlessly fall as a necessity
grit, determination, perseverance
trauma and distress melt out of pity
insults from childhood bounce as if I dance
morbid with sorrow for decades, the bright
-
enlightenment in my twenties switched on
initiate instruction to recall
near amnesia by others of harm done
slide down the chute, recovery to spawn
integrity tactics to overcome
depression as a clinical downfall
enigmatic and eccentric, how fun
artistically autistic, I was dumb
burdened by my punishment to behave
over two decades, the torture game set
obliged never to complain of the past
killing time enables me to forget
search my conscience to forgive, shadows cast
triumphantly moving over my grave
objections aside my death cannot last
resolve quarrels with squirrels and press save
ephemeral the clouds always move so fast
waiting for the Nepalese restaurant
across the street to open up again
starving, the hyperbole of a bore
killing himself slowly for many years
if long distance running is but a jaunt
literally, down the road without the yen
lifting me up, a butterfly in flight
injury added to insult, the tears
needlessly fall as a necessity
grit, determination, perseverance
trauma and distress melt out of pity
insults from childhood bounce as if I dance
morbid with sorrow for decades, the bright
-
enlightenment in my twenties switched on
initiate instruction to recall
near amnesia by others of harm done
slide down the chute, recovery to spawn
integrity tactics to overcome
depression as a clinical downfall
enigmatic and eccentric, how fun
artistically autistic, I was dumb
burdened by my punishment to behave
over two decades, the torture game set
obliged never to complain of the past
killing time enables me to forget
search my conscience to forgive, shadows cast
triumphantly moving over my grave
objections aside my death cannot last
resolve quarrels with squirrels and press save
ephemeral the clouds always move so fast
Friday, November 1, 2024
Gjǫrth ~ Friday, November 1, 2024
Little did he know with his girth in place
indeed, the wrong place, in fact, the wrong hole
that he could not tell made all the difference
that he lacked, truly, the wherewithal, Grace
left him well alone to do his business
even though Bull pulled out, my name is Cole
divine Grace, my mom, by an inference
indeed, let a man bugger from behind
diminished, he filled her up with stiffness
how I came into the world, thrown and born
egoless, my soul, transient sojourn
kissed by divine Grace, my mom, without scorn
needed a baby, no husband, slow burn
owl full of wisdom, from a seed so blind
worthless to debate the value of life
while each soul is born to live for how long
in arrhythmia, syncopated beats
tell time as tempo, battles without strife
how Bull took the news, I never found out
how Bull up and died, convenient, his schlong
inside divine Grace, my mom, whom he cheats
sits inside a well, poisoned forever
given narrative as a form, I shout
in praise of Dark Hype and Hype Dark, Hyde Park
resides my Karmann Ghia nostalgia
transforms all theories conspiracies spark
how Bull ended up, sick with myalgia
investigators found nothing ever
nearly so fishy, smelling very strange
pretend no foul play, no harm done, he fell
link Project MKUltra to a well
argue against hate and war, acid dreams
cover up army dreamers with their screams
emigrate to Spain, the Dutch in orange
indeed, the wrong place, in fact, the wrong hole
that he could not tell made all the difference
that he lacked, truly, the wherewithal, Grace
left him well alone to do his business
even though Bull pulled out, my name is Cole
divine Grace, my mom, by an inference
indeed, let a man bugger from behind
diminished, he filled her up with stiffness
how I came into the world, thrown and born
egoless, my soul, transient sojourn
kissed by divine Grace, my mom, without scorn
needed a baby, no husband, slow burn
owl full of wisdom, from a seed so blind
worthless to debate the value of life
while each soul is born to live for how long
in arrhythmia, syncopated beats
tell time as tempo, battles without strife
how Bull took the news, I never found out
how Bull up and died, convenient, his schlong
inside divine Grace, my mom, whom he cheats
sits inside a well, poisoned forever
given narrative as a form, I shout
in praise of Dark Hype and Hype Dark, Hyde Park
resides my Karmann Ghia nostalgia
transforms all theories conspiracies spark
how Bull ended up, sick with myalgia
investigators found nothing ever
nearly so fishy, smelling very strange
pretend no foul play, no harm done, he fell
link Project MKUltra to a well
argue against hate and war, acid dreams
cover up army dreamers with their screams
emigrate to Spain, the Dutch in orange
Wednesday, October 30, 2024
Names Changed to Protect the Innocent ~ Wednesday, October 30, 2024
They had no idea as kids, Jeanne and Leigh
how could I blame children as an adult
even as grown up folks if we could talk
yet, emotions never fade but simmer
hate-filled racist taunts in the Seventies
asked everyone to forgive the harm done
did the perpetrators never forget
never seems immediately after
or never again to think of the past
ideas as right or wrong were meaningless
don't get me wrong, religion had its place
even if theory and practice were Church
and State, separated by amendment
as Constitution meets Philosophy
stated as primary as slavery
kissing cousins of American Law
if I never met Brinsley and Schwarzkopf
do you think their actions are all my fault
such as I was not an American
Just a boy born in Bombay long ago
even though never to be President
as if spelling well as a kid was bad
nobody in Cali was ever good
not me, certainly, full of past triggers
even though we just wanted to have fun
ask me if I care anymore after
nearly forty years with an axe to grind
drop that blade, wish I could burn the handle
Leave this world better than we received it
ever thrown into Chaos, the Abyss
if I could imagine being beyond
given situations I find myself
horrified by the past, try to let go
how could I blame children as an adult
even as grown up folks if we could talk
yet, emotions never fade but simmer
hate-filled racist taunts in the Seventies
asked everyone to forgive the harm done
did the perpetrators never forget
never seems immediately after
or never again to think of the past
ideas as right or wrong were meaningless
don't get me wrong, religion had its place
even if theory and practice were Church
and State, separated by amendment
as Constitution meets Philosophy
stated as primary as slavery
kissing cousins of American Law
if I never met Brinsley and Schwarzkopf
do you think their actions are all my fault
such as I was not an American
Just a boy born in Bombay long ago
even though never to be President
as if spelling well as a kid was bad
nobody in Cali was ever good
not me, certainly, full of past triggers
even though we just wanted to have fun
ask me if I care anymore after
nearly forty years with an axe to grind
drop that blade, wish I could burn the handle
Leave this world better than we received it
ever thrown into Chaos, the Abyss
if I could imagine being beyond
given situations I find myself
horrified by the past, try to let go
Sunday, October 27, 2024
A Boy in a Skirt ~ Sunday, October 27, 2024
Crying but what for the hidden treasure
rest mariposa for what a long flight
yellow daffodil your beautiful lies
inspire creation / destruction pleasure
never insane pain beyond all reason
generate sacred healing honor bright
burn pepper and salt crystal azure skies
urn full of ashes broken bones and dust
terrible heartbreak except such treason
warps clear perception from heels up the spine
hover in constant anguish in the brain
as for all the tears pickled within brine
twisted ankles turn the world with a sprain
forget what is known blown out in a gust
of hot air unfair attitude old man
resolve all problems within this molehill
trapped on a mountain within a crevasse
how to freeze to death give up on the plan
enter the beyond behind the curtains
hide all repression with crude oil to spill
inside the outside never an impasse
decisions unmade reversed tarot card
destabilize hay bales with hard bargains
exit the bedroom screaming as a child
nothing but laughter for much suffering
tease with sadistic pleasure brutal wild
resort to denial block out buffering
entitled to smile to say life is hard
advantageous brick thick and dense as dirt
sugar always sweet sours rotten teeth
usury the cake to eat as a wreath
revel in honey why hurt people hurt
eclipsed by the moon a boy in a skirt
rest mariposa for what a long flight
yellow daffodil your beautiful lies
inspire creation / destruction pleasure
never insane pain beyond all reason
generate sacred healing honor bright
burn pepper and salt crystal azure skies
urn full of ashes broken bones and dust
terrible heartbreak except such treason
warps clear perception from heels up the spine
hover in constant anguish in the brain
as for all the tears pickled within brine
twisted ankles turn the world with a sprain
forget what is known blown out in a gust
of hot air unfair attitude old man
resolve all problems within this molehill
trapped on a mountain within a crevasse
how to freeze to death give up on the plan
enter the beyond behind the curtains
hide all repression with crude oil to spill
inside the outside never an impasse
decisions unmade reversed tarot card
destabilize hay bales with hard bargains
exit the bedroom screaming as a child
nothing but laughter for much suffering
tease with sadistic pleasure brutal wild
resort to denial block out buffering
entitled to smile to say life is hard
advantageous brick thick and dense as dirt
sugar always sweet sours rotten teeth
usury the cake to eat as a wreath
revel in honey why hurt people hurt
eclipsed by the moon a boy in a skirt
Saturday, October 26, 2024
Unvote the So-called American Left ~ Saturday, October 26, 2024
The unwoke awake during their own wake
how dead to undead and unwoke to woke
enters the canon as fodder for birds
underneath it all in anger, I quake
not from past neglect that I overlook
welcome to the poor in Chicago, broke
obscene on public transportation, words
kill all sense of care as to judge concern
even if I could offer aide and cook
asparagus grilled with Greek olive oil
would it be worthwhile, even lucrative
as the bottom line decides how much toil
killing my dead soul for a decorative
elegant dinner; so much to discern
dinner costs aside, my pride is my bride
underneath it all I shake with fury
ride the CTA to view sleeping bears
if not the Red Line, the Blue Line we ride
not far from the wild creatures without homes
given the mayor's scruples, the jury
takes to their chamber to discuss wild hairs
how undone the slum of Chicago teams
each night with vagrants begging, holding combs
if I could afford to feed the homeless
right the wronged and write off the money pit
of the IRS and other boneless
wealthy jellyfish who don't give a shit
nothing appears quite as clear as it seems
woke becomes on fleek, a joke cannot last
a dictionary detects its rejects
kindness by the side of the road injects
each person with "HOPE", a placard long past
how dead to undead and unwoke to woke
enters the canon as fodder for birds
underneath it all in anger, I quake
not from past neglect that I overlook
welcome to the poor in Chicago, broke
obscene on public transportation, words
kill all sense of care as to judge concern
even if I could offer aide and cook
asparagus grilled with Greek olive oil
would it be worthwhile, even lucrative
as the bottom line decides how much toil
killing my dead soul for a decorative
elegant dinner; so much to discern
dinner costs aside, my pride is my bride
underneath it all I shake with fury
ride the CTA to view sleeping bears
if not the Red Line, the Blue Line we ride
not far from the wild creatures without homes
given the mayor's scruples, the jury
takes to their chamber to discuss wild hairs
how undone the slum of Chicago teams
each night with vagrants begging, holding combs
if I could afford to feed the homeless
right the wronged and write off the money pit
of the IRS and other boneless
wealthy jellyfish who don't give a shit
nothing appears quite as clear as it seems
woke becomes on fleek, a joke cannot last
a dictionary detects its rejects
kindness by the side of the road injects
each person with "HOPE", a placard long past
Tuesday, October 22, 2024
(Schlimazel) שלימזל ~ Tuesday, October 22, 2024
To have been better as a bed wetter
oil sheet warm then cold mother the queer smell
humble bumble bee free never to sting
ave Maria knit me a sweater
virtuous patience my wrath full of ire
ever since childhood broken as a bell
bitter jitterbug smite me with one swing
end this senseless search for birch sap syrup
ever neurotic erotic empire
nervous from the start first vomits fresh milk
buttermilk pancakes Brother Jake to give
etter suisse framboise to wear with a kilt
tickle me senseless with one life to live
tough motherfucker, a stainless steel cup
enjoy the boy toy flash buckle your belt
rejoice Brother Jake, King Charles we behead
ask never questions born of lust and cash
suck was a queer word Stephen feels a welt
as to enable a fabled schism
beast of least burden titans live undead
eternal struggle as under the lash
dark hype types hard bop cop a feel schlemiel
winter freezes balls bukkake jism
exit the rat race move on shoot your load
terror of torture sadistic brother
taunt kid brother bro nevermore to goad
epic recipe destroys the other
remember mother no game without spiel
oil sheet warm then cold mother the queer smell
humble bumble bee free never to sting
ave Maria knit me a sweater
virtuous patience my wrath full of ire
ever since childhood broken as a bell
bitter jitterbug smite me with one swing
end this senseless search for birch sap syrup
ever neurotic erotic empire
nervous from the start first vomits fresh milk
buttermilk pancakes Brother Jake to give
etter suisse framboise to wear with a kilt
tickle me senseless with one life to live
tough motherfucker, a stainless steel cup
enjoy the boy toy flash buckle your belt
rejoice Brother Jake, King Charles we behead
ask never questions born of lust and cash
suck was a queer word Stephen feels a welt
as to enable a fabled schism
beast of least burden titans live undead
eternal struggle as under the lash
dark hype types hard bop cop a feel schlemiel
winter freezes balls bukkake jism
exit the rat race move on shoot your load
terror of torture sadistic brother
taunt kid brother bro nevermore to goad
epic recipe destroys the other
remember mother no game without spiel
Monday, October 21, 2024
Blockage ~ Tuesday, March 22, 2022
[1]
Allegedly, I was three years old when we left London for Kew Gardens, Queens in New York City. Little did I know then my brother would succeed exactly as he should, older, colder, wiser. Despite our differences... I was a sensitive, little monster... mommy cared for us equally. Yet, I felt emptiness as we crossed the ocean.
I was unbearable to my family, a flaw.
Would that I could not be born like poor George Bailey, as an utter failure, victim of circumstance, savvy people saw through my innocent disguise.
Three years old, old enough to walk, talk, act stupid. However, as a child, I appeared without fault. Remember, I was small, cute and apparently without an ounce of guile. Even then, deception deceives the deceiver. Enter '72 without a clue, so blue.
Yesterday, I woke up and went running at dawn. Exactly, fifty years later I write about a time I can never recover from the past. Remember, I am three years old when it took place. Still, my first memory... I should really forget.
Old, old, old... getting old is never any fun. Let me be twenty-two, or even thirty-two. Diminished returns, this life not worth the investment.
When I went to visit Amanda, as a child, how full of emotion, I told her, "I love you." Even as a small boy, this was appropriate. Nope! My older brother thought otherwise and laughed.
While four years of difference is not a lot in age, exceptions to the rule must be made for sadists.
Leaving London, England was tragic in a sense. Even then, as a child, I thought myself, British for our passports said so, though this is in hindsight. To say I was British would be a huge mistake.
[2]
London? No, Middlesex. Near where my father worked. Only, I was too young to know much about it. Not that we ever saw much of our dad as kids. Despite loving our mom, he worked at the airport. Only, it was Party Central and our father not just came from Kenya, he came from Nairobi.
Forget the past, they say, move on with your own life. Only, the blockages, these stuck points get sticky. Remember, memories retain for a reason.
Kiss the girls, make them cry. I said my last goodbye. Enter American airspace as immigrants. Would I be anything otherwise in their eyes.
Grant me serenity but to whom do I speak, asking for charity, for kindness, for favors. Remember, I was born in Bombay, not London. Despite being a child, I was a foreigner. Even if I could speak and write Perfect English. No one saw me as theirs, as from their own homeland. Sucker to believe in the American Dream.
Question reality, study philosophy. Understanding nothing, but experiences. Enter contemplation, contemplate suicide. Every act has merits, reward this life with death. No, with no certainty... this is all that we know. Still, to end misery... it is a temptation.
If I were without flaws as a perfect diamond... no, I am a monster, never a good person.
New York City, a flash! We were gone in two years. Even if I had met Bobby Diggs, the RZA, would that make a difference, born a week after me.
Yet, I was neither Black, nor anyone Black kids on the outskirts of life cared anything about. Remember, South Asians are simply immigrants. Kill a Hindu, a Sikh, create a Hate Crimes Act.
Crippled in my own mind, broken, a fractured life. In the city, I saw from our sixth story view that people appear small, that balsa planes fly far. Yet, I started to learn... I was just a small man.
[3]
Lessons to learn in life, turn anger into gold. If I blame anyone that energy returns to haunt my days on earth, to follow my footsteps, to appear as spectres, as phantoms, or as ghosts. Little did I know then, as a child, how it works, everyone knows karma, everyone learns dharma.
Despite our age difference, my brother got along in spite of hating me as his little brother, despite his sadism, I learned some good lessons.
I learned never to trust, never to talk or feel.
Kismet divides my lot, this is my destiny. Nothing less than to write about the blockages. Obey the directions offered by our parents. Would that they realized defense mechanisms.
That was then, this is now. Fifty-three years of age, how do I shake it off, need I ask Taylor Swift? Every musician knows how difficult it is... not to succeed, but fail until they can succeed.
Music was my first love and so I played the drums, yet fate placed poetry before my eyes, I wept.
Beyond this world, I know nothing is for certain. Religion teaches us to believe, to have faith. Only, a skeptical, questioning mind sees past theological words as the chatter of birds. Hungry to understand, I understood limits. Even in calculus, we encounter limits. Religion, I gave up for Lent, as the joke goes.
Wine, women, and song but no, I was no sailor. Only a madman thought with his brain, not his dick. Under the tyranny of my own character, (let me preface this thought with the fact I shaped it), demented as I was to others, I was sure.
Satori was a flash, gradual and then gone. Under these conditions, I expected something. Calamity to want, to desire what is gone. Catastrophe happens, still I must restructure. Engage futility with misunderstanding. Enter into debates, thinking I know better. Despite knowing nothing, Socrates kept his cool.
[4]
Enter a foreign land, nowhere are we at home. Xenophobia saves natives from foreigners. America knows well to decimate natives. Caution signs on the shore should have pointed inwards. Tragically, genocide had not been coined, as yet. Let the indigenous peoples have their lands back. Yet, we cannot undo what has been done with guns.
Attempts to understand Manifest Destiny strike a chord of disgust at our pride and hubris.
History writes itself with the blood of others. Empty the pen of ink, fill it up with more blood.
Should I concern myself with words beyond my scope? How to practice my words, to preach my word is bond? Or hypocritical, just as everyone else? Under the tyranny of language, of life lived, limit experience until experiments decide how I should live out the rest of my life.
Older now, still a child striving to be a man. Little inside my mind, the blockages persist. Defense mechanisms get in the way of growth. Even to realize this fact, helps nobody. Realize potentials, actualize the truth.
Crabby as a Cancer but why identify, order constellations using my own metric, lift the veil, envision a universe beyond dimensions created by scientists in Rome, entertain other thoughts, other minds, other worlds, residing in the mind, the self is not the stars.
Wisdom is not beauty, this visceral domain, intelligence wastes time, energy, resources, struggles to keep up with our fierce competition, engages tug-of-war, to win or lose is all, recall failure / success are aspects of this game.
[5]
Diametrically in opposition across each radiant circle speaks dialectically specious arguments, spectacular mirrors presenting truth as such, as it appears in fact, in all good faith, the oak believes in the acorn, triumphs within itself simply by existing, existence seemingly the essence of being.
Organize, rearrange the constructs of this world, unequal in measure, to place recognition reasonably higher than imagination...
Does this make sense to me, society orders indifference to pleasure or pain, a secret gift from antiquity, fools, exactly like ourselves, finding out about life, guided by assumptions, experiments to learn about anatomy, research on cognition, processes of thinking, experience with gold, ethics and politics, natural science and the physical laws of creativity placed as a schema over each point in the system, the universe measured specifically to man.
I was a hateful child, I learned what I was taught.
Would that I had been taught how to love, not to judge. As simple as turning over within the mind, such as I do in bed asleep behind the wheel.
As a child, I would ask impossible questions.
Something inside my brain needed to know, "what if..." every time my brother was proximal to me. Not that he cared for me and my questions, annoyed, sick and tired of hearing thoughts out of deep, left field. If only I could be quiet for a moment. Though, I was a shy guy, a sincere introvert. If anyone wanted to shine it was Leo, very extroverted, outgoing and social, exact opposites, boys who bothered each other.
[6]
The Universe Is All My Fault ~ Monday, October 21, 2024
Trustworthy? No one, ever, not a soul!
remember my wife? My ex-wife? You know
until the moment she chose to do harm
still, I was not good, a lump of black coal
trust not the mirror of language for shame
wastes time on ego, on image, on glow
orbit persona to sound the alarm
reveal tit-for-tat gossip as karma
trained dog, housebroken, but not beyond blame
how stupid is love without children, dumb
yet, we were happy until we were not
Nobody offers fair warning, too numb
organically drunk, hormones tie the knot
obtain a divorce, move on, when dharma
notifies the wheel to turn, separate
each takes a deep breath to reflect on change
exit stage left, go, with the house on fire
visions of dark pitch, bituminous spate
eternally trapped in asphalt gravel
remember the dog in the street with mange
no, this hell is mine, made by my desire
orders of angels, what a fucking lie
tell me what to say when the court gavel
asks Bodhidharma if death travels west
suddenly, I watched paint dry on the wall
over nine long years, it became a test
until I awoke as if in free-fall
left with the writing, no more apple pie
remember my wife? My ex-wife? You know
until the moment she chose to do harm
still, I was not good, a lump of black coal
trust not the mirror of language for shame
wastes time on ego, on image, on glow
orbit persona to sound the alarm
reveal tit-for-tat gossip as karma
trained dog, housebroken, but not beyond blame
how stupid is love without children, dumb
yet, we were happy until we were not
Nobody offers fair warning, too numb
organically drunk, hormones tie the knot
obtain a divorce, move on, when dharma
notifies the wheel to turn, separate
each takes a deep breath to reflect on change
exit stage left, go, with the house on fire
visions of dark pitch, bituminous spate
eternally trapped in asphalt gravel
remember the dog in the street with mange
no, this hell is mine, made by my desire
orders of angels, what a fucking lie
tell me what to say when the court gavel
asks Bodhidharma if death travels west
suddenly, I watched paint dry on the wall
over nine long years, it became a test
until I awoke as if in free-fall
left with the writing, no more apple pie
Sunday, October 20, 2024
Unembraced ~ Sunday, October 20, 2024
For a second, she looks at me as if...
or am I deceived by the mama bear
really, I could be handsome in her eyes
as if I were a good person, a whiff
say of Z by Ermenegildo Zegna
even in my Lululemon, I fare
close to second in style, her husband cries
out to make way to their children in tow
not that I am not patient, Sardegna
does that name suit you, exotic beauty
sucker that I am for blue eyes, I pass
however confident in my duty
emblematic of one never so crass
licensed to chill, ice bucket wheel barrow
organic apples and ripe bananas
obtained at the grocery store, pity
kindness, an old man in need of a hug
see me, in my pocket, sixteen annas
as if I were ethical and honest
truly impossible in the city
maybe if I were just a lady bug
even a doctor or a lawyer, no
ambition to get ahead without rest
suffer the emptiness within sorrow
internal/external dichotomy
fraught with passion, beg, steal, even borrow
old man without a tracheotomy
reasonable to say you never know
or am I deceived by the mama bear
really, I could be handsome in her eyes
as if I were a good person, a whiff
say of Z by Ermenegildo Zegna
even in my Lululemon, I fare
close to second in style, her husband cries
out to make way to their children in tow
not that I am not patient, Sardegna
does that name suit you, exotic beauty
sucker that I am for blue eyes, I pass
however confident in my duty
emblematic of one never so crass
licensed to chill, ice bucket wheel barrow
organic apples and ripe bananas
obtained at the grocery store, pity
kindness, an old man in need of a hug
see me, in my pocket, sixteen annas
as if I were ethical and honest
truly impossible in the city
maybe if I were just a lady bug
even a doctor or a lawyer, no
ambition to get ahead without rest
suffer the emptiness within sorrow
internal/external dichotomy
fraught with passion, beg, steal, even borrow
old man without a tracheotomy
reasonable to say you never know
Saturday, October 19, 2024
A Mere Footnote in History ~ Saturday, October 19, 2024
Is it my fault that you are beautiful
still, it is not my place to fall in love
if you were ugly or maybe a dog
terrible as that sounds if you could pull
me into your orbit into your sphere
yet though I circle as if from above
friendship with a hawk leaves me in a bog
as if waiting for Seamus to come dig
until his pen runs out of ink unclear
luminosity within gravity
tumble into your influence and fall
tragically without a shred of pity
humbled by your impudence and your gall
as if I could elect another Whig
trouble is that I vote anarchist, right
yes, I am grotesque, don't look at me, please
only the hideous Clooney and Pitt
undertake to make me handsome despite
age, grey hair, wrinkles and weight to transform
rubies into diamonds but if I sneeze
everything goes to waste just so much shit
beggars belief, forgive me, please, your grace
exacts tribute as the ladybugs swarm
around my arrhythmia, cold, black stone
undertakers of love bury nonsense
titanic interruption on the phone
information angelic in defense
for or against the hoi polloi, the case
under review for lack of evidence
lack of common sense, lack of pounds and pence
still, it is not my place to fall in love
if you were ugly or maybe a dog
terrible as that sounds if you could pull
me into your orbit into your sphere
yet though I circle as if from above
friendship with a hawk leaves me in a bog
as if waiting for Seamus to come dig
until his pen runs out of ink unclear
luminosity within gravity
tumble into your influence and fall
tragically without a shred of pity
humbled by your impudence and your gall
as if I could elect another Whig
trouble is that I vote anarchist, right
yes, I am grotesque, don't look at me, please
only the hideous Clooney and Pitt
undertake to make me handsome despite
age, grey hair, wrinkles and weight to transform
rubies into diamonds but if I sneeze
everything goes to waste just so much shit
beggars belief, forgive me, please, your grace
exacts tribute as the ladybugs swarm
around my arrhythmia, cold, black stone
undertakers of love bury nonsense
titanic interruption on the phone
information angelic in defense
for or against the hoi polloi, the case
under review for lack of evidence
lack of common sense, lack of pounds and pence
Wednesday, October 16, 2024
Celebrate the Traces ~ Wednesday, October 16, 2024
As you know by now we used LSD
so as to escape our need to grow up
yes we were minors on a weekend trip
out of sorts as teens reading poetry
until crash landing with a defunct band
kiss the past goodbye we drink from the cup
no innocence lost dipped more than the tip
orbits awakened pupils dilated
we watched as traces past after the hand
but to hear Spirit talk philosophy
yet no one could see the unseen prophet
no one cared to eat cake but the coffee
only when sober at meetings befit
wonders never cease wishes belated
work or go to school college for last call
each day we undrank excesses of pain
until we split up went our separate ways
suck it through a straw stranded as to fall
excess leads wisdom to let go of hope
decidedly thoughts made us both insane
Liquidate the mind unknown through the haze
Success overlooks the fact we smoked dope
Diminished by time we found poverty
so as to escape our need to grow up
yes we were minors on a weekend trip
out of sorts as teens reading poetry
until crash landing with a defunct band
kiss the past goodbye we drink from the cup
no innocence lost dipped more than the tip
orbits awakened pupils dilated
we watched as traces past after the hand
but to hear Spirit talk philosophy
yet no one could see the unseen prophet
no one cared to eat cake but the coffee
only when sober at meetings befit
wonders never cease wishes belated
work or go to school college for last call
each day we undrank excesses of pain
until we split up went our separate ways
suck it through a straw stranded as to fall
excess leads wisdom to let go of hope
decidedly thoughts made us both insane
Liquidate the mind unknown through the haze
Success overlooks the fact we smoked dope
Diminished by time we found poverty
Wednesday, October 9, 2024
Human Resources: The Grimsby Report ~ Wednesday, October 9, 2024
The unsayable turns against the tide
how if I were blind to my own actions
each day, if I act the martyr to grief
unless I accept and therefore abide
not in sympathy, caught up in a role
sucker to succor, my own distractions
argue not to strengths but to seek relief
yellow zinnia, I lack all courage
as the unemployed drink beer on the dole
bile, irritable, angry, vexed at heart
lingers complacent, satisfied and smug
each day, I am blind to smell my own fart
turn against others, lash out, pull the rug
underneath us all, distress in storage
reside in trauma, cheetah in a cage
nocturnal raccoons free to sniff and roam
suffer the children as adults little
as the town crier whose opinions rage
grate the ears of maize in a cornfield maze
as if words could burn waves of white sea foam
if I am privileged, am I so brittle
not to withstand hate, I wander, a clue
stirs up the cauldron, the pot to amaze
traumatized infants, shaken, nothing stirs
the newscaster more, a son of the law
how daddy was hurt sounds as a gear whirs
each day, my body hurts under the claw
take a dumb, black cat, pouncer, no one knew
if elder statesmen, entitled and free
decide other's fate, to live in a shoe
each day, I pray that I'm not you, agree
how if I were blind to my own actions
each day, if I act the martyr to grief
unless I accept and therefore abide
not in sympathy, caught up in a role
sucker to succor, my own distractions
argue not to strengths but to seek relief
yellow zinnia, I lack all courage
as the unemployed drink beer on the dole
bile, irritable, angry, vexed at heart
lingers complacent, satisfied and smug
each day, I am blind to smell my own fart
turn against others, lash out, pull the rug
underneath us all, distress in storage
reside in trauma, cheetah in a cage
nocturnal raccoons free to sniff and roam
suffer the children as adults little
as the town crier whose opinions rage
grate the ears of maize in a cornfield maze
as if words could burn waves of white sea foam
if I am privileged, am I so brittle
not to withstand hate, I wander, a clue
stirs up the cauldron, the pot to amaze
traumatized infants, shaken, nothing stirs
the newscaster more, a son of the law
how daddy was hurt sounds as a gear whirs
each day, my body hurts under the claw
take a dumb, black cat, pouncer, no one knew
if elder statesmen, entitled and free
decide other's fate, to live in a shoe
each day, I pray that I'm not you, agree
Sunday, October 6, 2024
Red Line ~ Sunday, October 6, 2024
More than poverty, Gertie saw no hope
observe the people in order to help
reach out as you can to assist those lost
experience shows lives destroyed by dope
thanatos is change itself more than death
how we look away while mental health
advocates advise no matter the cost
not to directly intervene but ask
provided the harm done from years on meth
opens the back door to offer a hand
victims of hateful politics resist
every chance to change while each grain of sand
reveals orange peals makes trauma desist
trauma and distress both wear the black mask
yet, Gertie wants more as she has no fear
Gertie cooks dinner in a small kitchen
empty of workers other than herself
resolved to assist to make plainly clear
time returns each day to check in and see
if people accept the past as a den
engaged with vipers like books on a shelf
see what attracts you to make things better
avenues with false opportunity
wind the roads to catch you and yours off guard
nothing but the trees reach toward the sun
opportunity shifts as work is hard
hard as mining rocks for diamonds for fun
opportunity knocks in a sweater
poverty hopes pain without gain is done
empty promises success is hard-won
observe the people in order to help
reach out as you can to assist those lost
experience shows lives destroyed by dope
thanatos is change itself more than death
how we look away while mental health
advocates advise no matter the cost
not to directly intervene but ask
provided the harm done from years on meth
opens the back door to offer a hand
victims of hateful politics resist
every chance to change while each grain of sand
reveals orange peals makes trauma desist
trauma and distress both wear the black mask
yet, Gertie wants more as she has no fear
Gertie cooks dinner in a small kitchen
empty of workers other than herself
resolved to assist to make plainly clear
time returns each day to check in and see
if people accept the past as a den
engaged with vipers like books on a shelf
see what attracts you to make things better
avenues with false opportunity
wind the roads to catch you and yours off guard
nothing but the trees reach toward the sun
opportunity shifts as work is hard
hard as mining rocks for diamonds for fun
opportunity knocks in a sweater
poverty hopes pain without gain is done
empty promises success is hard-won
Saturday, October 5, 2024
La Mauvaise Foi ~ Saturday, October 5, 2024
This is the phenomenal world
here, everything changes
if you blink, it might disappear
so, fasten your seat belt
if you look around, this may be your life
still the camera may pan elsewhere
this world happens so fast
have it your way if you are bored
each moment flashes like a bulb
pretend you understand
however everyone knows you do not
everyone knows because nobody knows
no one understands why we are alive
or they pretend to know while they are blind
most people lose their way from this blindness
even with perfect vision they can't see
no one can read the signs, or the red flags
as for those in authority, they lie
lies are at the root of all the blindness
welcome to this, the phenomenal world
obey the rules or find yourself locked up
running changes everything, if you run
little else makes a difference, in the end
decide how to act, choose your course, and go!
here, everything changes
if you blink, it might disappear
so, fasten your seat belt
if you look around, this may be your life
still the camera may pan elsewhere
this world happens so fast
have it your way if you are bored
each moment flashes like a bulb
pretend you understand
however everyone knows you do not
everyone knows because nobody knows
no one understands why we are alive
or they pretend to know while they are blind
most people lose their way from this blindness
even with perfect vision they can't see
no one can read the signs, or the red flags
as for those in authority, they lie
lies are at the root of all the blindness
welcome to this, the phenomenal world
obey the rules or find yourself locked up
running changes everything, if you run
little else makes a difference, in the end
decide how to act, choose your course, and go!
Saturday, September 28, 2024
al-qubba (قُبَّةُ) ~ Saturday, September 28, 2024
When first I was born, I swallowed a book
holier than God left inside a vault
enter an alcove to meet your maker
nothing but a wisp of salty air, look
forgotten by dust, the ashes of bones
in an alcove, God weeps, in debt, whose fault
recovery sets the record, faker
straightens up the bills in the drawers, the cost
to house God inside a bank vault, the stones
I skip on water, Satan's daughter sleeps
within a fury, angry at her lot
as the black pepper in soup, while God weeps
storms in the ocean, beware of his snot
beware as he hocks a loogie, he lost
order, the blue pearl, spun out of control
revel in excess, corals pale a shade
near the atomic bikini atoll
I swallow the book as the decades fade
swarms of bees, my beard, memories, each strand
wash my eyes and face, Satan's daughter calls
as I seek refuge in darkness, so cold
light cannot reach me, as if to demand
liquid clarity filtered beyond pitch
objections aside, she stumbles and falls
words fail me, my bride, I laugh hard and bold
each day the birds curse epithets on race
difficult to say why the sparrows bitch
at passersby, click, the shutter closes
blasphemy to speak of God and the Book
only as the thorns cut my head, roses
olfactory bulb, a scent on a hook
kill me Judas-kind, rood without a trace
holier than God left inside a vault
enter an alcove to meet your maker
nothing but a wisp of salty air, look
forgotten by dust, the ashes of bones
in an alcove, God weeps, in debt, whose fault
recovery sets the record, faker
straightens up the bills in the drawers, the cost
to house God inside a bank vault, the stones
I skip on water, Satan's daughter sleeps
within a fury, angry at her lot
as the black pepper in soup, while God weeps
storms in the ocean, beware of his snot
beware as he hocks a loogie, he lost
order, the blue pearl, spun out of control
revel in excess, corals pale a shade
near the atomic bikini atoll
I swallow the book as the decades fade
swarms of bees, my beard, memories, each strand
wash my eyes and face, Satan's daughter calls
as I seek refuge in darkness, so cold
light cannot reach me, as if to demand
liquid clarity filtered beyond pitch
objections aside, she stumbles and falls
words fail me, my bride, I laugh hard and bold
each day the birds curse epithets on race
difficult to say why the sparrows bitch
at passersby, click, the shutter closes
blasphemy to speak of God and the Book
only as the thorns cut my head, roses
olfactory bulb, a scent on a hook
kill me Judas-kind, rood without a trace
Tuesday, September 24, 2024
Rape Blossoms ~ Tuesday, September 24, 2024
Rape Blossoms. Wait don't you mean, "love blossoms"
as you know with President Blund, rapeseed
predatory behavior presents
exhibit A as curled up opossums.
Blunders persist in politics, she says
laugh at the gaffe, she's not halfwrong, we bleed
over palm oil production, he resents
sinister insinuations of a plot
surreptitious cultivation, he plays
old boy object petit a from a lack
make America Blunder again, crack
sexist jokes on TV, it fills the slot
as you know with President Blund, rapeseed
predatory behavior presents
exhibit A as curled up opossums.
Blunders persist in politics, she says
laugh at the gaffe, she's not halfwrong, we bleed
over palm oil production, he resents
sinister insinuations of a plot
surreptitious cultivation, he plays
old boy object petit a from a lack
make America Blunder again, crack
sexist jokes on TV, it fills the slot
Wednesday, September 18, 2024
Forlorn for California ~ Wednesday, September 18, 2024
Sometimes, I wish I could turn back the clock
on a date we were together, not all
maybe four of us, the others elsewhere
everywhere and nowhere, before the shock
tumbling, stumbling, crumbling mumble bunny
in time, I would overcome my own fall
magically, as if I were meant to share
energy elliptic as gravity
sometimes, I wish I could tell how funny
I appear to others, to myself, blind
windows outwards face, mirrors inwards face
if I as body could envision mind
subtle objects in space, I accept grace
however lost within a cavity
I turn back the clock of memories lost
catch-as-catch-can, no-holds-barred, we hold hands
older than teenagers but now no more
until I uncover the total cost
let us just say no more are we at home
difficult as it was, we left our lands
the sea, the sand, the sun, the surf, the shore
until our reunion, thirty years hence
remember life under the big, blue dome
nothing but appearances, all those lies
badgered as an adult, how I look back
at our time together, the stormy skies
cool to watch lightning, at the beach, attack
kindness as a concept, dollars and cents
traffic circles, orbits in gravity
how a moment escapes our awareness
everyday I miss how we are all gone
cancer eats away at the cavity
leaves me lonesome for ages in stages
obliged to lick my wounds in all fairness
cancer is my politics, as a pawn
kiss my friends goodbye as the sea rages
on a date we were together, not all
maybe four of us, the others elsewhere
everywhere and nowhere, before the shock
tumbling, stumbling, crumbling mumble bunny
in time, I would overcome my own fall
magically, as if I were meant to share
energy elliptic as gravity
sometimes, I wish I could tell how funny
I appear to others, to myself, blind
windows outwards face, mirrors inwards face
if I as body could envision mind
subtle objects in space, I accept grace
however lost within a cavity
I turn back the clock of memories lost
catch-as-catch-can, no-holds-barred, we hold hands
older than teenagers but now no more
until I uncover the total cost
let us just say no more are we at home
difficult as it was, we left our lands
the sea, the sand, the sun, the surf, the shore
until our reunion, thirty years hence
remember life under the big, blue dome
nothing but appearances, all those lies
badgered as an adult, how I look back
at our time together, the stormy skies
cool to watch lightning, at the beach, attack
kindness as a concept, dollars and cents
traffic circles, orbits in gravity
how a moment escapes our awareness
everyday I miss how we are all gone
cancer eats away at the cavity
leaves me lonesome for ages in stages
obliged to lick my wounds in all fairness
cancer is my politics, as a pawn
kiss my friends goodbye as the sea rages
Monday, September 16, 2024
Summum bonum ~ Monday, September 16, 2024
If I were younger ... such is not the case
forget Wittgenstein ... by now, he's long dead
I am just body ... no duality
were I twenty-five ... awareness in place
each day I wake up ... I write down my dreams
read and write and sleep ... Oblomov in bed
each day I study ... mortality
youth is not wasted ... but the best-laid schemes
of enticed children ... ends up in a hole
underground, hidden ... the bodies in piles
needless senselessness ... whatever the goal
granted, rhetoric ... now I run for miles
each day that I rest ... energy I store
rest until I work ... exhausted, what more
sit and meditate ... drop off not drop out
until body fades ... drowning, grasp at straws
challenged by the smoke ... extinguished candle
haunted by the past ... grotesque water spout
if I were older ... and, yes, not dead yet
sycophantic bores ... suffer Plato’s Laws
never a stranger ... untouched by scandal
open up her box ... double entendre
tempted by the fruit ... the irony, bet
tell me, Socrates ... what is emptiness
hold the door open ... good morning, rejoice
engulfed in the fire ... welcome readiness
clasp the necklace shut ... sterling silver voice
as the case might be ... visit Szentendre
sentence St. Andrew ... crucifix saltire
each day in Scotland ... the end of Empire
Saturday, September 14, 2024
Darth Verim ~ Saturday, September 14, 2024
If feeder is home
Feeder has not fed me, yet
Feeder must feed me
Empire ends with Rome
Empire sets the world on fire
Devil-may-care, bet
Empire shapes glory
Remind me to wake Feeder
Is as I desire
Shapes glorify sense
Hold me back, where is my food
Old dogs, pure nonsense
Murder is my mood
Empire kills Vader
Feeder has not fed me, yet
Feeder must feed me
Empire ends with Rome
Empire sets the world on fire
Devil-may-care, bet
Empire shapes glory
Remind me to wake Feeder
Is as I desire
Shapes glorify sense
Hold me back, where is my food
Old dogs, pure nonsense
Murder is my mood
Empire kills Vader
Friday, September 13, 2024
Poland, 1939 ~ Friday, September 13, 2024
Little do they know
even if I remember
bittersweet kisses
even if I blow
nonsense gestures as I leave
still in September
risk never misses
a mark as golden as dawn
until next time, grieve
make yourself aware
must an educated guess
even if you scare
adults as restless
now as a doe and her fawn
shadows in a show
even if I remember
bittersweet kisses
even if I blow
nonsense gestures as I leave
still in September
risk never misses
a mark as golden as dawn
until next time, grieve
make yourself aware
must an educated guess
even if you scare
adults as restless
now as a doe and her fawn
shadows in a show
Thursday, September 12, 2024
Reynard ~ Thursday, September 12, 2024
Is it just me then
seeing the one lunatic
inhabiting space-
time since God knows when
just me hearing the sparrows'
unsound rhetoric
suffering with grace
these little chatterboxes
mean by the narrows
emerge black and blue
touch wood solemn under oath
heaven knows where to
enter River Lethe
note the wily, old foxes
seeing the one lunatic
inhabiting space-
time since God knows when
just me hearing the sparrows'
unsound rhetoric
suffering with grace
these little chatterboxes
mean by the narrows
emerge black and blue
touch wood solemn under oath
heaven knows where to
enter River Lethe
note the wily, old foxes
Monday, September 2, 2024
Ἀλεξάνδρεια ~ Monday, September 2, 2024
She was my high noon
how goes my missing shadow
eclipsed by the moon
woman makes me croon
as badly as a black cat
sings a sweet fado
must I sing a tune
yes, or howl low as a wolf
how sad not to scat
if only my voice
graced could drown bees down my throat
how this was my choice
now, old as a goat
how goes my missing shadow
eclipsed by the moon
woman makes me croon
as badly as a black cat
sings a sweet fado
must I sing a tune
yes, or howl low as a wolf
how sad not to scat
if only my voice
graced could drown bees down my throat
how this was my choice
now, old as a goat
ornery as foul Rudolf
object of no fan
object of no fan
not catch-as-catch-can
Sunday, August 25, 2024
Coercion ~ Sunday, August 25, 2024
For me, as you know
other things happen, not great
really not that bad
maybe, I could show
everyone, maybe even
a judge, some debate
some lives are just sad
yolk on my face, such disgrace
only roll seven
under duress, twist
knife until you hear a scream
now, untwist your wrist
only in this dream
wisdom takes wits to save face
other things happen, not great
really not that bad
maybe, I could show
everyone, maybe even
a judge, some debate
some lives are just sad
yolk on my face, such disgrace
only roll seven
under duress, twist
knife until you hear a scream
now, untwist your wrist
only in this dream
wisdom takes wits to save face
Sunday, August 18, 2024
Transference ~ Sunday, August 18, 2024
One day, she woke up
never for a good reason
everything changes
decidedly, cup
after cup of black coffee
yet, as each season
shifts and exchanges
heat for cold and back again
each sheet of toffee
shattered and broken
holds sweetness in each morsel
every unspoken
word, how Nita fell
on hard times, as if to feign
kisses and bear hugs
empty promises
undermines her provinces
projects words at slugs
never for a good reason
everything changes
decidedly, cup
after cup of black coffee
yet, as each season
shifts and exchanges
heat for cold and back again
each sheet of toffee
shattered and broken
holds sweetness in each morsel
every unspoken
word, how Nita fell
on hard times, as if to feign
kisses and bear hugs
empty promises
undermines her provinces
projects words at slugs
Saturday, August 17, 2024
Therapist Priest ~ Saturday, August 17, 2024
Traumatized as a boy, he confessed how
heaven knows how he knew, how to follow
each person in his parish to see why
Boredom, the Almighty, creates the now
uplifting the heavens, to allow lust
truth hidden in desire, empty, hollow
loquacious as a duck, cooked in stir-fry
everyone knew the priest, I knew him best
researched my whereabouts, within such trust
Despite the fact that I did nothing wrong
in prison, on Death Row, I rot, justice
defends the innocent but for a song
If a serial killer, Augustus
tricked the law to frame me, then, be my guest
heaven knows how he knew, how to follow
each person in his parish to see why
Boredom, the Almighty, creates the now
uplifting the heavens, to allow lust
truth hidden in desire, empty, hollow
loquacious as a duck, cooked in stir-fry
everyone knew the priest, I knew him best
researched my whereabouts, within such trust
Despite the fact that I did nothing wrong
in prison, on Death Row, I rot, justice
defends the innocent but for a song
If a serial killer, Augustus
tricked the law to frame me, then, be my guest
Petite madeleine ~ Saturday, August 17, 2024
When I was a child
how freely I spoke and felt
each emotion grow
never mild but wild
I was born as a shipwreck
waiting for the belt
adrift ice floe
sunken with all my treasure
as I stood on deck
children in lifeboats
hold hands and wave goodbye
in vests and pea coats
left behind, I cry
dust and sand, tears of pleasure
how freely I spoke and felt
each emotion grow
never mild but wild
I was born as a shipwreck
waiting for the belt
adrift ice floe
sunken with all my treasure
as I stood on deck
children in lifeboats
hold hands and wave goodbye
in vests and pea coats
left behind, I cry
dust and sand, tears of pleasure
Thursday, August 15, 2024
Kalingādhipati ~ Thursday, August 15, 2024
Kalingādhipati
Brilliant! If I say so myself, Ātman
underneath the veneer, the veil, the guise
talent weighs on the scales, in the balance
talent is practice within anātman
hidden in plain sight within selflessness
emptiness, Śūnyatā, wears a disguise
trust not appearances, let your talents
rule as a guide to truth, for sooth, I speak
under guard, lock and key, my carelessness
took hold, a prisoner, in a dark keep
hold on to your horses, this is my home
if I earn what I deserve, then I sleep
soundly, underneath the big, blue sky dome
only appearances favor the weak
never mind the guttersnipes, those who know
live within reflection, contemplate mind
yet, words get in the way, to overcome
kindness as an idea, watch the light show
needles pierce the fabric, perceptions melt
objects in the mirror appear unkind
wicked, smoke and dragons, as we become
nervous, full of anxiety, dharma
builds by actions, choices, decisions felt
yet, directed by a moral compass
guttersnipes, Joe Strummer, I missed The Clash
until disappointment fades, comes to pass
truth is simply a word, a sword I slash
time and space as concepts, all is karma
except not vendetta, vengeance, revenge
remove schadenfreude for ahiṃsā
serve not joy within misfortune, resist
needless acrimony as to avenge
in principle, one wrong for another
perhaps war for the Lord of Kalinga
escapes civil conduct, as we insist
serves all, father, mother, sister, brother
Brilliant! If I say so myself, Ātman
underneath the veneer, the veil, the guise
talent weighs on the scales, in the balance
talent is practice within anātman
hidden in plain sight within selflessness
emptiness, Śūnyatā, wears a disguise
trust not appearances, let your talents
rule as a guide to truth, for sooth, I speak
under guard, lock and key, my carelessness
took hold, a prisoner, in a dark keep
hold on to your horses, this is my home
if I earn what I deserve, then I sleep
soundly, underneath the big, blue sky dome
only appearances favor the weak
never mind the guttersnipes, those who know
live within reflection, contemplate mind
yet, words get in the way, to overcome
kindness as an idea, watch the light show
needles pierce the fabric, perceptions melt
objects in the mirror appear unkind
wicked, smoke and dragons, as we become
nervous, full of anxiety, dharma
builds by actions, choices, decisions felt
yet, directed by a moral compass
guttersnipes, Joe Strummer, I missed The Clash
until disappointment fades, comes to pass
truth is simply a word, a sword I slash
time and space as concepts, all is karma
except not vendetta, vengeance, revenge
remove schadenfreude for ahiṃsā
serve not joy within misfortune, resist
needless acrimony as to avenge
in principle, one wrong for another
perhaps war for the Lord of Kalinga
escapes civil conduct, as we insist
serves all, father, mother, sister, brother
Wednesday, August 14, 2024
Unification ~ Wednesday, August 14, 2024
Now everybody—
on your marks, get set, and go
winner takes it all
what is samādhi
how collective unconscious
arises, shadow
transforms as the fall
of old orders coincides
round bored, obnoxious
witnesses, selfish
how we desire property
and wealth as shellfish
there, our poverty
needs to look up, as the tides
over and above
witness a hard shove
on your marks, get set, and go
winner takes it all
what is samādhi
how collective unconscious
arises, shadow
transforms as the fall
of old orders coincides
round bored, obnoxious
witnesses, selfish
how we desire property
and wealth as shellfish
there, our poverty
needs to look up, as the tides
over and above
witness a hard shove
The Big Fish ~ Wednesday, August 14, 2024
Needle pops balloons
emergent gas creates sound
escapes from prison
dives into saloons
lifts up skirts at Moulin Rouge
enters each unfound
perhaps with vision
organs on the Black Market
provide days in Bruges
seldom seen by sick
bludgeoned folk left in bathtubs
as a candlewick
leaves a scent of scrubs
lingering in hospitals
only their patients
organ-deprived wait
necessarily, patience
serving them as bait
emergent gas creates sound
escapes from prison
dives into saloons
lifts up skirts at Moulin Rouge
enters each unfound
perhaps with vision
organs on the Black Market
provide days in Bruges
seldom seen by sick
bludgeoned folk left in bathtubs
as a candlewick
leaves a scent of scrubs
lingering in hospitals
only their patients
organ-deprived wait
necessarily, patience
serving them as bait
Temporality ~ Wednesday, August 14, 2024
To connect the dots
obviously, before time
creates perceptions
ordered into slots
not that we can imagine
needlessly, a mime
eating conceptions
connecting the dots with light
transforms a famine
that all time is one
how time, before the big bang
explodes as a pun
decisively, fang
or claw, to defend our site
time implodes dharma
seen within karma
---
Imagine that time
moves within our perceptions
as if a straight line
gives meaning to crime
in the street or in our homes
now these deceptions
emerge as a fine
torn away from what is real
how we write these poems
as if what is right
takes place before our own eyes
time becomes the light
if past the disguise
maybe we could break the seal
even solve the prime
obviously, before time
creates perceptions
ordered into slots
not that we can imagine
needlessly, a mime
eating conceptions
connecting the dots with light
transforms a famine
that all time is one
how time, before the big bang
explodes as a pun
decisively, fang
or claw, to defend our site
time implodes dharma
seen within karma
---
Imagine that time
moves within our perceptions
as if a straight line
gives meaning to crime
in the street or in our homes
now these deceptions
emerge as a fine
torn away from what is real
how we write these poems
as if what is right
takes place before our own eyes
time becomes the light
if past the disguise
maybe we could break the seal
even solve the prime
Tuesday, August 13, 2024
Sailor's Delight ~ Tuesday, August 13, 2024
Your relationship
opens at dawn in the spring
under clear, blue skies
rust creeps up your slip
rust oxidizes your pipes
ends your time to sing
leaves you with your lies
as summer comes, your beach reads
transport tinder swipes
introduced in bars
on trains and planes with cocktails
nearly wrecking cars
so, as autumn fails
how to prepare for what breeds
in winter, the sun
pulses cold, no fun
opens at dawn in the spring
under clear, blue skies
rust creeps up your slip
rust oxidizes your pipes
ends your time to sing
leaves you with your lies
as summer comes, your beach reads
transport tinder swipes
introduced in bars
on trains and planes with cocktails
nearly wrecking cars
so, as autumn fails
how to prepare for what breeds
in winter, the sun
pulses cold, no fun
Saturday, August 10, 2024
Mirror ~ Saturday, August 10, 2024
The old man is my old friend, Nemesis
he is not my father, nor my brother
exactly what he is is uncertain
older than stellar dust, he believes bliss
little does he know, comes from ignorance
decidedly, this dolt is the Other
mark my words, you can lower the curtain
as he snores through Carmina Burana
noticeably, he farts during the dance
if the mirror of language were applause
still, he would stand up and bow in response
my old friend, Nemesis, is not the cause
yet, he is not the man either, ensconce
old age in ageist terms, turn arcana
lightly over the green felt card table
decidedly, The Fool, his fate is sealed
friend or zero, my foe is my downfall
rise from the ashes, as I am able
imaginary bird, Phoenix, am I
even the clairvoyant, her blood congealed
not from the laying of the cards but small
decidedly, imperceptible sounds
Now is her house haunted or is my mind
eventually, in such decay, the tricks
my old friend, Nemesis, plays on my eyes
enter the mirror stage holding two bricks
such golden bars weigh nothing to the lies
inflicted by stardust in leaps and bounds
such is the burden found within a kiss
he is not my father, nor my brother
exactly what he is is uncertain
older than stellar dust, he believes bliss
little does he know, comes from ignorance
decidedly, this dolt is the Other
mark my words, you can lower the curtain
as he snores through Carmina Burana
noticeably, he farts during the dance
if the mirror of language were applause
still, he would stand up and bow in response
my old friend, Nemesis, is not the cause
yet, he is not the man either, ensconce
old age in ageist terms, turn arcana
lightly over the green felt card table
decidedly, The Fool, his fate is sealed
friend or zero, my foe is my downfall
rise from the ashes, as I am able
imaginary bird, Phoenix, am I
even the clairvoyant, her blood congealed
not from the laying of the cards but small
decidedly, imperceptible sounds
Now is her house haunted or is my mind
eventually, in such decay, the tricks
my old friend, Nemesis, plays on my eyes
enter the mirror stage holding two bricks
such golden bars weigh nothing to the lies
inflicted by stardust in leaps and bounds
such is the burden found within a kiss
Sunday, August 4, 2024
Murmuration ~ Sunday, August 4, 2024
Wu Ch'i said: 'I am able to inquire into what is hidden and by means of the past investigate the course of future events.'
---
yet to stain the floors with blood
mark my words, disdain
emulates full sway
anarchic pendulum swing
naturally, the flood
sidles past the slain
orbits via elliptic
forces on the wing
travels in the sky
hoi polloi, starlings in flight
eagerly, they scry
positions of slight
affluence, status cryptic
status, a measure
to praise their pleasure
Thursday, August 1, 2024
Augustus ~ Thursday, August 1, 2024
August is for atoms and atonement,
understanding Partition takes its toll
grieving history is impossible
unless it happens to your kind, hell-bent
set to make governments pay symbolic
taxes only poets know of this goal
itinerant claims, incognizable
stalk the earth as soldiers, as veterans
forgotten in their trauma, all too sick
organically in distress since childhood
remember your children do not fight wars
atom bombs drop, celebrate as we should
that we think we should celebrate in bars
or create monuments on deaf islands
makes a mockery of millions who died
suddenly, in a flash, ripped off their flesh
as radioactive energy, dust
necessarily ends carnage, they cried
dry tears of determination to show
atonement as a strategy to thresh
tried and true economics and lust
over the journeymen, what they endure
necessary for a country to grow
expiation for sins, actions of hate
men argue and debate the need for war
eventually, something breaks through the grate
needless surprise attacks, carnage and gore
trust not ancient rivalries as the cure
understanding Partition takes its toll
grieving history is impossible
unless it happens to your kind, hell-bent
set to make governments pay symbolic
taxes only poets know of this goal
itinerant claims, incognizable
stalk the earth as soldiers, as veterans
forgotten in their trauma, all too sick
organically in distress since childhood
remember your children do not fight wars
atom bombs drop, celebrate as we should
that we think we should celebrate in bars
or create monuments on deaf islands
makes a mockery of millions who died
suddenly, in a flash, ripped off their flesh
as radioactive energy, dust
necessarily ends carnage, they cried
dry tears of determination to show
atonement as a strategy to thresh
tried and true economics and lust
over the journeymen, what they endure
necessary for a country to grow
expiation for sins, actions of hate
men argue and debate the need for war
eventually, something breaks through the grate
needless surprise attacks, carnage and gore
trust not ancient rivalries as the cure
Wednesday, July 24, 2024
Unofficial Business ~ Wednesday, July 24, 2024
One hand claps my ear
no irony rings the bell
enter the zen-dō
harmony, a tear
as it rolls down, I feel sound
not bad, not unwell
despite a soft blow
clearly, Zenji hears the pitch
lifts me, wings unbound
anger, desire, fear
pains me more than delusion
serves me right, unclear
mind, a decision
yesterday, at dusk, I stitch
each cut with some thread
as to what I dread
restless wolves, an ancient witch
no irony rings the bell
enter the zen-dō
harmony, a tear
as it rolls down, I feel sound
not bad, not unwell
despite a soft blow
clearly, Zenji hears the pitch
lifts me, wings unbound
anger, desire, fear
pains me more than delusion
serves me right, unclear
mind, a decision
yesterday, at dusk, I stitch
each cut with some thread
as to what I dread
restless wolves, an ancient witch
Sunday, July 21, 2024
entre ces deux langues ~ dimanche, 21 juillet 2024
il y a cette boîte
le chat à l'intérieur
y partícula
alfa de largo
caliente alcance
entre les deux mondes
tué ou vivant
tué le chat de l'espace
entre deux états
boire du vin rosé
organiser une grande fête
î (i-circumflex)
tirer ton chapeau
entre la vie et la mort
Friday, July 19, 2024
Demure Drug Mule ~ Friday, July 19, 2023
As sweet as sugar
suffer the saccharine trust
sucrose assets save
wealth from a hooker
each sex worker knows their trade
each pimp works like rust
till plow to the grave
ask not who earns a deep cut
sugar makes the grade
sorrow defines life
under the scalpel, abort
gifts within such strife
ask not what they snort
real cocaine out of her butt
suffer the saccharine trust
sucrose assets save
wealth from a hooker
each sex worker knows their trade
each pimp works like rust
till plow to the grave
ask not who earns a deep cut
sugar makes the grade
sorrow defines life
under the scalpel, abort
gifts within such strife
ask not what they snort
real cocaine out of her butt
Thursday, July 18, 2024
Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response ~ Thursday, July 18, 2024
To attain enlightenment, satori
on the Red Line seems antithetical
answer me this, do you expect to find
the wisdom you seek under a torii
the vicinity seems right but a lie
attached to objects categorical
in an instant to awaken to mind
nothing without perfect understanding
enlightenment doesn't come cheap, the sky
needs to be replaced, that's a lot of paint
leave the clouds alone, people like them white
ideology becomes a complaint
given notions of purity and light
however, no one can stop the branding
transcend reality on the Red Line
even if it cannot be done, just try
nothing but emptiness and wisdom true
maybe not here, tingles up your straight spine
even such sensory responses speak
nothing for satori, I sit and cry
trying to make sense of a world so blue
sorrow and suffering help me reflect
as people appear ignorant and weak
transcend reality, the help you need
obey the rules of physics, get on, sit
realize their anger, hatred and greed
involve the conditions, create a pit
on the Red Line seems antithetical
answer me this, do you expect to find
the wisdom you seek under a torii
the vicinity seems right but a lie
attached to objects categorical
in an instant to awaken to mind
nothing without perfect understanding
enlightenment doesn't come cheap, the sky
needs to be replaced, that's a lot of paint
leave the clouds alone, people like them white
ideology becomes a complaint
given notions of purity and light
however, no one can stop the branding
transcend reality on the Red Line
even if it cannot be done, just try
nothing but emptiness and wisdom true
maybe not here, tingles up your straight spine
even such sensory responses speak
nothing for satori, I sit and cry
trying to make sense of a world so blue
sorrow and suffering help me reflect
as people appear ignorant and weak
transcend reality, the help you need
obey the rules of physics, get on, sit
realize their anger, hatred and greed
involve the conditions, create a pit
of despair and delusion, to detect
nothingness beyond the self, the story
transcend reality, seek no-glory
how elusive is the mirror of mind
even if one word slips out this I find
Restlessness in others creates small waves
ever still as a placid lake, a stone
drops to create ripples, pass all the graves
Literally, the dead offer a bone
if this is not humorous, leave aside
nothing but pain and suffering, gory
each cemetery we pass, there, my bride
Saturday, July 13, 2024
Summertime ~ Saturday, July 13, 2024
Anticipation, silently, I buzz
slinky as a little black dress, I bless
the ground beneath her mythic feet, I flee
how to escape a rape, a snake, I push
each apiarist far away, I seek
passion, the afterlife, poet, I guess
robes flowing to the marble floors, I see
only flies on the walls, summer, I die
visions of justice wronged, such breadth, I creak
each floorboard bends, a shade, such weight, I smoke
restless dust in the Underworld, I work
bitter memories into ash, I woke
in death to loveless emptiness, I twerk
at the nightclub, or a strip club, I cry
lonely as the other, my wife, I find
forgotten by the birds, sparrows, I hear
lingering in bushes, chatter, I break
into song, the women listen, I grind
each lens into ashes and dust, I want
selfish thoughts to disappear, soon, I fear
orbits of gravity escape, I stake
nothing but, yes, my loneliness, I trail
through tomato gardens, hopeless, I ask
humanity to remember, I fail
each day to uncover fortune, I mask
wealth in a magical disguise, I haunt
aspects of this world, ignorant, I shine
limber as a leaf, green as spring, I dream
language reaches the dead, absurd, I cream
slimy walls, maggots and pus, splat, I pine
slinky as a little black dress, I bless
the ground beneath her mythic feet, I flee
how to escape a rape, a snake, I push
each apiarist far away, I seek
passion, the afterlife, poet, I guess
robes flowing to the marble floors, I see
only flies on the walls, summer, I die
visions of justice wronged, such breadth, I creak
each floorboard bends, a shade, such weight, I smoke
restless dust in the Underworld, I work
bitter memories into ash, I woke
in death to loveless emptiness, I twerk
at the nightclub, or a strip club, I cry
lonely as the other, my wife, I find
forgotten by the birds, sparrows, I hear
lingering in bushes, chatter, I break
into song, the women listen, I grind
each lens into ashes and dust, I want
selfish thoughts to disappear, soon, I fear
orbits of gravity escape, I stake
nothing but, yes, my loneliness, I trail
through tomato gardens, hopeless, I ask
humanity to remember, I fail
each day to uncover fortune, I mask
wealth in a magical disguise, I haunt
aspects of this world, ignorant, I shine
limber as a leaf, green as spring, I dream
language reaches the dead, absurd, I cream
slimy walls, maggots and pus, splat, I pine
Thursday, July 11, 2024
Alien Citizen ~ Thursday, July 11, 2024
As the song, "Born in the U.S.A.", plays
silently, I rage inside with sorrow
the decades spent in this country, the fact
how I got here, to what purpose, it stays
empty, my lack of pride, lack of pleasure
silently, I seethe with rage, beg, borrow
or even steal, if to take what I lack
nowhere to run, ain't got nowhere to go
given two legs, I run to seek treasure.
Born in Bombay, millions I left behind
over and over, we moved, place to place
remember nothing, memories turn blind
nowhere is home, family is my disgrace
if alcoholism were a game show
not that I would ever know, now you see
the reason I studied philosophy
how I needed to make sense of childhood
emotional and sensitive, no good.
Until I became an adult, all grown
Sugar was sweet, I was beat, I was blown
Away by California girls, the years
passed, I grew up, I grew old, I shed tears
lonesome, an alien, a citizen
after my father died, a simpleton
yes, these words I string, a popcorn necklace
still, poor, no business sense, this room, my space
silently, I rage inside with sorrow
the decades spent in this country, the fact
how I got here, to what purpose, it stays
empty, my lack of pride, lack of pleasure
silently, I seethe with rage, beg, borrow
or even steal, if to take what I lack
nowhere to run, ain't got nowhere to go
given two legs, I run to seek treasure.
Born in Bombay, millions I left behind
over and over, we moved, place to place
remember nothing, memories turn blind
nowhere is home, family is my disgrace
if alcoholism were a game show
not that I would ever know, now you see
the reason I studied philosophy
how I needed to make sense of childhood
emotional and sensitive, no good.
Until I became an adult, all grown
Sugar was sweet, I was beat, I was blown
Away by California girls, the years
passed, I grew up, I grew old, I shed tears
lonesome, an alien, a citizen
after my father died, a simpleton
yes, these words I string, a popcorn necklace
still, poor, no business sense, this room, my space
Wednesday, July 10, 2024
Karen ~ Wednesday, July 10, 2024
In my arms, you fit
not that I then understood
mistook the red flags
yet, here and now, sit
awaiting your sweet embrace
rest assured, I brood
mistakes, pack your bags
still, you I will always love
yes, my arms, this space
once you fit, I stare
until the window turns black
fixed, wishful, I dare
in a heart attack
to call out your name, my dove
not that I then understood
mistook the red flags
yet, here and now, sit
awaiting your sweet embrace
rest assured, I brood
mistakes, pack your bags
still, you I will always love
yes, my arms, this space
once you fit, I stare
until the window turns black
fixed, wishful, I dare
in a heart attack
to call out your name, my dove
Tirich Mir til topps ~ Wednesday, July 10, 2024
Once there was a time
not long ago, not at all
children were this tall
each child had a dime
time was the days were longer
how long no one knew
each child who could grew
really strong and then, stronger
each day the trees wept
wept for each child born
as each child grew very big
smaller than a pig
as big as a thorn
to adorn every rose bush
in time gardeners learned
many a child yearned
each day to grow in the Kush
not long ago, not at all
children were this tall
each child had a dime
time was the days were longer
how long no one knew
each child who could grew
really strong and then, stronger
each day the trees wept
wept for each child born
as each child grew very big
smaller than a pig
as big as a thorn
to adorn every rose bush
in time gardeners learned
many a child yearned
each day to grow in the Kush
Tuesday, July 9, 2024
Tussy Presides ~ Tuesday, July 9, 2024
The ego is fierce
how it will never let go
endless figure eights
even as to pierce
gallantly a large balloon
order is for show
if The President debates
seeking election
for a silver spoon
in an infant's mouth
elicits a certain charm
recent polls go south
contain the alarm
ejection in detection
how it will never let go
endless figure eights
even as to pierce
gallantly a large balloon
order is for show
if The President debates
seeking election
for a silver spoon
in an infant's mouth
elicits a certain charm
recent polls go south
contain the alarm
ejection in detection
Sunday, July 7, 2024
मार ~ Sunday, July 7, 2024
Murderer demure
under death's dark influence
recovers her sense
decent and secure
even her apprehension
reveals affluence
egoless, immense
recovery in a cell
despite detention
execution row
masks her willingness to serve
under no Lucknow
response to observe
enmity, a bell
under death's dark influence
recovers her sense
decent and secure
even her apprehension
reveals affluence
egoless, immense
recovery in a cell
despite detention
execution row
masks her willingness to serve
under no Lucknow
response to observe
enmity, a bell
Singularity ~ Sunday, July 7, 2024
In one direction,
needless to say but I speak
of temporal sense;
now my objection,
earnest as a pledge: my plight
diminishes weak
introspection; hence,
remove the veil of white lies,
emerge into light;
correction: as time
takes no time whence to unfold
in itself: a chime
of one note, so bold
no one perceives its disguise.
needless to say but I speak
of temporal sense;
now my objection,
earnest as a pledge: my plight
diminishes weak
introspection; hence,
remove the veil of white lies,
emerge into light;
correction: as time
takes no time whence to unfold
in itself: a chime
of one note, so bold
no one perceives its disguise.
Friday, July 5, 2024
Il pagliaccio ~ Friday, July 5, 2024
The world irritates
how it rubs against the grain
excites as to vex
witless dust frustrates
old ashen corpse broken down
reason out the brain
leave the world a hex
death spell or a placid lake
interview a clown
realize the smile
realize the fallen tear
invokes bitter bile
transform hate from fear
authenticity so fake
turn genuine strain
engaged in good sex
sieve water through clean sluice gates
how it rubs against the grain
excites as to vex
witless dust frustrates
old ashen corpse broken down
reason out the brain
leave the world a hex
death spell or a placid lake
interview a clown
realize the smile
realize the fallen tear
invokes bitter bile
transform hate from fear
authenticity so fake
turn genuine strain
engaged in good sex
sieve water through clean sluice gates
Thursday, July 4, 2024
ο αστεροφάγος ~ Thursday, July 4, 2024
At PK's, a bar, Irish, a chip shop
to associate football, Chicken Tikka Masala
Preposterous space, a pipe dream fitted
Kicks for penalties, or Papa Kitty
suck shit and die, this one life, upstairs, a bookstore and flights
a massage parlor, yoga studio
basking in the sun with a rooftop pool
a high-rise hotel, too much, location, Hyde Park, Hype Dark
remember the bills, the debts and the rent
If I were lucky, studied business, stars
ricochet across the sky at night, a meteor falls
if I were born rich, I'd clear the oceans
such debris to choke all of Alaska
how to end this endless life, full of marvel and wonder
asterophagos eats stars and pipe dreams
chonky, pitch black cat in the restaurant
helps himself to the food dropped and left for waste by patrons
if supporters knew how important dreams
placed and fitted square means to an artist
shrug your limp, drunken shoulders, why should you care, language bakes
hearty, Goan meals, Vindaloo Palace
order a Guinness in the Irish pub
pop on by for a massage or practice Haṭha yoga
to associate football, Chicken Tikka Masala
Preposterous space, a pipe dream fitted
Kicks for penalties, or Papa Kitty
suck shit and die, this one life, upstairs, a bookstore and flights
a massage parlor, yoga studio
basking in the sun with a rooftop pool
a high-rise hotel, too much, location, Hyde Park, Hype Dark
remember the bills, the debts and the rent
If I were lucky, studied business, stars
ricochet across the sky at night, a meteor falls
if I were born rich, I'd clear the oceans
such debris to choke all of Alaska
how to end this endless life, full of marvel and wonder
asterophagos eats stars and pipe dreams
chonky, pitch black cat in the restaurant
helps himself to the food dropped and left for waste by patrons
if supporters knew how important dreams
placed and fitted square means to an artist
shrug your limp, drunken shoulders, why should you care, language bakes
hearty, Goan meals, Vindaloo Palace
order a Guinness in the Irish pub
pop on by for a massage or practice Haṭha yoga
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