Mumble Bunny never knew how funny
Uncle Sonny who knew nothing about
Money made his millions on the market
Buying and selling stocks to trade for fun
Like a game with Monopoly money
Everyday on the phone with his broker
But Uncle Sonny knew his wife never
Understood his scheming as compulsive
Never saw him on the phone all day long
Never believed her own husband was hooked
Yet he felt his addiction a success
Nobody knew Uncle Sonny went bust
Every time the bubble burst his money
Virtually went up in flames the fire
Engulfed his house in a triple mortgage
Really he was poorer as a salesman
Knocking door-to-door with a spiel in hand
Nifty little quips to sell vacuum parts
Even back then his schemes to make money
Were founded on needless supplies to help
Helpless housewives make their dull lives cleaner
Only if he knew how to beat the dust
Worshipful of the company he kept
From the rugs in the dens of their husbands
Under no pretenses would these women
Not only buy the parts for their vacuums
No they would even find some extra time
Yes to give Uncle Sonny a blowjob
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