Thursday, December 5, 2019

Practice ~ Thursday, 5 December 2019

Dear Nancy, 

I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to let you down. I never meant to break your heart. I never meant to disappoint you. You expected me to send you a letter that summer you went away, back home to the country to visit with your grandparents. When you came back in the fall for school, you said you would never speak to me again. It made me sad. But then, I moved on, took more drugs, graduated from high school, and fell completely apart. If it is not too late to say I'm sorry, I apologize, may I do so now, over thirty years later. My regrets are not just my own but for the friendship I squandered by not doing one simple thing, writing you a letter while you were away. My heart remembers what the mind forgets, pushes away in egocentric fits of anger. I am angry at myself, I made a mistake, then continued to make mistakes until I learned how to accept making mistakes as part of the process of understanding what it means to be alive and human. I hope you are well. Peace. 

Best regards, 
Rui
XOXO

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